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Dorney Park Haters Anonymous

Monday, August 22, 2005


There's a ride called The Whip, it's an old ride which is an oval with cars rotating on the outside of a center barrier counterclockwise. as the cars approach the end of the oval it accelerates, whipping the car around the turn. the cars seat 2 people. now picture this. Imagine we're not wearing seatbelts. if you're in the passenger seat of my car and I violently make a left turn will you slide into me? Of courtse not, I'd slide into you. Common sense tells you that.

Dorney apaprently operates in an alternate universe where the laws of physics work differently. My father in-law has worked in amusement parks for 40 years, and one of his jobs was to maintain, assemble And disaasemble, as well as operate the whip. He kmnows as well as anyone else that the heavier person should sit on the outside, if they don't they'd throw their weight against the person on the inside. Dorneys rules for this ride clearly state that the heavier person should sit on the inside...

So he went to ride with my son and he tried to get Andy on the inside and then sit on the outside. The rider oeprator refused and kept telling him to reverse it, and naturally my FIL argued with him. Eventually when it became clear that the ride operator wouldn't back down, he removedf my son from the ride and they left. They complained to park operations, and we'll see what they say. Since my FIl takes this very seriously, if tyhey blow us off we'll complain to the state licensing board that certifies rides.

let's see them blow off the state as easily.

(1 angry customer | BITCH!)

Friday, March 18, 2005

7:11PM - Dorney Should Def. Die!

Wow. This community has died. But I still hate Dorney. I shall tell you my tale, maybe we can save this.
Last year I went on a school trip to Dorney (aka: Hell)
I counted down in my journal until I went. I was excited when I woke up. I have never been there and I heard it was really fun. I get there and I was somewhat anticipating some fun but it had turned out to be a total nightmare.

Some friends and I attempted to get on the "Wild Mouse" but of coarse the line was too long and when the people next to you smell like something ungodly your not going to stay there too long now are you.

Soo I went on the stupid swings with some friends. It's not like it was very fun. Not anything special, I think thats why the line wasn't that long. It's amuses no one. I went on that twice just to waste some time. I knew from there my day was going to suck.

I had a shitload of cash so what do I do? Waste it. I once again saved it to come to that shit-hole called Dorney.

I can imagine the people that work there and I feel sorry for you. To put up with the people that come there and the little kiddies. I would probably break 4 necks an hour. Probably more.

The only fun I had was going to water works but of coarse one of our friends was asked to not stay in there because he had jeans on. What the hell. For all they know he couldn't afford a swim suit (but fortunatly thats not the case)

Sadly, I lost all of my friends at one point and just randomly walked around. I didn't go past the wild mouse, because to me it seemed to dense me it was the back of the park. I heard about all this cool stuff and then to me it seemed only like 4 rides wasn't cool. My feet hurt and I wanted to kill someone. Then as were LEAVING and the bus drives away I see a "back" to the park. I noticed rides I maybe would have attempted to get in line for. I hit my head against the window and almost broke it.

I wasted in all: My time, my money, the strentgh in my feet, my sanity, and of coarse my sense of smell.
Thats pretty sad. The only thing I got was a gigantic Care Bear that now sits in my closet and I bought a necklace that broke. Grrreeeeattt.

My closing arguements: Dorney should burn in hell.

:+: An Angered Customer:+:

Extra: I'm soo jealous I don't own an amusement park that sucks that bad. Someday.

Current mood: jealous

(2 angry customers | BITCH!)

Tuesday, October 19, 2004


hey, i just was woundering how is halloweekends this year?


Friday, October 15, 2004


i think i joined. but i just want to say it is a really cheap park with all of three rides. the ride that i like the most there was steal force, and that was when i was 9. going there last summer, i never came to realize what i liked about it. it is the most cheap park aside to the Shawnee water park. i think they should rip down that park and put in somthing worth while like a six flags or a decent water park or somthing. and another thing they are like totally over priced, last time i went a big cup of soda was $8. which is ridiculus. thats it though.. i just dont know if i am a member or like anything you know.

(4 angry customers | BITCH!)

Wednesday, October 22, 2003


This is great. I wasn't put on October's schedule, so I just kept quiet and didn't go back. I can happily say that I haven't been there since September!! I can't wait for next weekend when I get to hand in my ID. I want to thank whoever made up the schedule for carousel! ahh I hate Dorney Park..


Sunday, September 14, 2003


I actually have to work today.. 1-close, at emporium. That's the worst shift. ehh I'm also a little bit sick. anyone else ever feel like hanging themselves sometimes rather than venturing over to dorney park? I think I feel like that a little too much.

I know I know it wasn't much of an entry. But no one's been posting and this was the best I could do. I'm not so good with remembering exact conversations like zach over there. Ok well gotta go get ready to leave, wish me luck.


Current mood: sick